1. No one ever escapes from the Jem'Hadar... until Sisko!
2. Q messed with Sisko once and only once.
3. No stupid accent.
4. Single handily turned Bajor into a major point of commerce.
5. Once blackmailed a Ferengi.
6. Coolest voice of any Star Trek captain.
7. Sisko is known throughout Bajor as a major religious figure.
8. Many people have to wait years for a starship command. Sisko
went to StarFleet and made them give him the Defiant.
9. Never has to worry about bad hair days.
10. He threw his girlfriend in jail and she still loves him.
11. His son is an up and coming writer.
12. Faced the Borg at Wolf 359 and lived to tell about it.
13. He and Dax once trashed a casino because they didn't like
the games.
14. Sisko never said, "Take this cheese to sickbay."
15. Sisko never got lost in the Delta Quadrant.
16. Sisko doesn't wear a toupee'.
17. Sisko kicked Q's ass.
18. Sisko never lost a starship to an inferior enemy such as
twenty-year-old bird of prey or a Ferengi cruiser
19. Sisko doesn't give a damn about Klingon beliefs.
20. Sisko can trash a runabout and never have to answer for it.
21. Sisko was responsible for the death of a major Bajoran
religious figure and never had to answer for it.
22. Sisko once out-dealed the Grand Nagus
23. Sisko stole Picard's Security and Transporter chiefs
24. Sisko dates regularly.
25. Sisko changed the face of the Cardassian legal system
just by staring at the judge.
26. Sisko set the standard for StarFleet uniforms
27. When Sisko brings the Defiant back from the Gamma Quadrant, the
phasers are still smoking.
28. Sisko made his Chief of Operations put the Station repairs
on hold so he could fix the replicators so Sisko could
get a decent cup of coffee.
29. Sisko kicks people out of his office regularly.
30. Sisko single-handedly started a reform movement on Earth
that wiped out homelessness.
31. Anytime there is a problem on Earth, StarFleet calls in Sisko.
32. Sisko would have personally thrown Wesley out an airlock.
33. Sisko never has to wear a girdle.
34. Sisko can cook up a gourmet feast while the culinary highlight
on all of the other ships were eggs that no one could
eat or leola root.
35. Sisko would mop the floor with the Kazon.
36. Sisko would've never been in Star Trek V.
37. Sisko's first officer would never wear a tattoo.
38. Sisko was never once turned into a 12-year-old by his transporter.
39. Sisko has never been outsmarted by a holodeck character.
40. Sisko never mutated into a salamander and mated with his helmsman.
41. No one ever stole Sisko's first officer's brain.
42. Kira would never beat up Sisko because of a strong mating urge.
(Although it would be interesting!)
43. Five seasons and Wesley hasn't saved the station (yet)!
44. Sisko's son turned an illiterate Ferengi into a model StarFleet
cadet.
45. Sisko would've killed the Pakleds.
46. Sisko isn't wishy-washy about the prime directive.
47. Sisko survived a battle where a galaxy-class starship was blown to
pieces in nothing but a partially disabled runabout.
48. Sisko intimidated Picard.
49. Sisko's dad betrayed StarFleet and never had to answer for it.
50. Sisko has mastered look known by all on Deep Space Nine that
means, "Don't f*@# with me today!" |
