Spongebob: (looking at a jellyfish through a
telescope) Wow, four stingers. (puts on his glasses
as he walks over to the jellyfishputs on glasses and walks
over to jellyfish. Tries to catch the jellyfish but he
catches himself. He hears a noise and goes to check on
what it is. Over the cliff is a squirrel fighting with
a giant clam) Where have I seen this before? (takes
a book out called 'Field Guide' and searches for the squirrel
he saw) Here it is! (finds a pircutre of the squirrel) Land
squirrel. That little squirrel is in trouble.
Sandy: Take that, you sorry old clam! Y’all
need to learn some manners! (after punishing the clam,
she walks away) You’re about as ugly as homemade
Spongebob: Hooray, land squirrel! (giant clam
jumps back at her and swallows her into its mouth) Look
out! (Spongebob runs down to help the squirrel) Hold
on, little squirrel! (yells karate moves while jumping
around the clam. Jumps on top of the clam) You have
fought well, giant clam. Prepare to be vanquished! (attempts
to open clam's mouth but the squirrel is really doing all
the work even though he thinks he's really doing it) Hey,
I’m actually doing it! (attempts more but as soon
as the clam's mouth opens, he jumps off landing his head
in a hole but he pulls his head out a few seconds later) Your
shell is mine! (pulls pants up like urkel does and runs
back onto the clam's tongue. He sees the squirrel is still
in the clam until she closes it)
Sandy: Hold on there, little square dude! (goes
back to help Spongebob. She kicks and punches Spongebob
out of the clam. Then she kicks the clam to the other side
of Bikini Bottom)
Spongebob: Hey, you like karate, too! (yells
some karate moves and then lands upside-down) So, what’s
Sandy: Sandy. (yells karate moves as well) What
do ya'll call yourself?
Spongebob: (runs up a hill and jumps down) I’m
Spongebob! (lands in the ground on the top left corner
of his body)
Sandy: Well Spongebob, take a gander at this. (walks
up to a rock and karate chops it with her hand. A few seconds
later, the rock explodes into a bunch of pieces)
Spongebob: Oh yeah? Well watch this! (makes noises
with his armpit)
Sandy: (laughs) I like you, Spongebob. Why,
we could be tighter than bark on a tree. Hi-ya! (karate
chops Spongebob's head)
Spongebob: Uhh, I like you too, Sandy. Hi-ya! (karate
chops her helmet but realizes it hurts) Say, what's
that thing on your head?
Sandy: Why, that’s my air helmet.
Spongebob: May I try it on?
Sandy: Heck no. I need it to breathe! I gotta have
Spongebob: Me too! I love air! Air is good.
Sandy: No kidding?
Spongebob: Why, air is my middle name! The more
air, the better! Can’t get enough of that air.
Sandy: She-oot. How about coming over tomorrow for
tea and cookies then? (gives Spongebob a map with directions
to her treedome) Don’t be late. (walks off)
Spongebob: Ok, see you tomorrow. (runs back home) Patrick!
Patrick! (Patrick is laying on his back on top of his
rock) Patrick! Patrick, Patrick, Patrick! What’s
Spongebob: I just met this girl. She wears a hat
full of air.
Patrick: Do you mean she puts on airs?
Spongebob: I guess so.
Patrick: That’s just fancy talk. If you want
to be fancy, hold your pinky up like this. (shows the
proper way to hold up your pinky) The higher you hold
it, the fancier you are.
Spongebob: (holds pinky up) How’s that?
Spongebob: (holds pinky higher) Like that?
Patrick: Now that’s fancy! They should call
you Spongebob Fancypants!
(at Sandy's treedome)
Patrick: Remember, when in doubt, pinky out. You
can do it, Spongebob. I’ll be watching. (opens
the door as Spongebob walks in with his pinky raised high
and flowers in his right hand)
Spongebob: Thanks pal. (Patrick closes the door
as Spongebob walks up to ring the doorbell)
Spongebob: Hiya, Sandy. It’s me, Spongebob.
Sandy: Hold on a sec, I’ll let you in. (red
light flashes as Spongebob begins to whistle.a red light
buzzes and Spongebob whistles. All the way drains out and
Spongebob begins to scream. Sandy opens the door and Spongebob
flops around inside like a fish)
Spongebob: Sandy, something’s gone terribly
wrong. There’s no water in... (notices there is
no water inside her treedome) ...here.
Sandy: Course there’s no water. Nothing but
Spongebob: (reaches and smells the air) No
Sandy: That ain’t a problem, is it? (karate
chops air) Hi-ya!
Spongebob: Problem? (laughs as he does a karate
chop in air) Hi-ya! That’s how I like my air! (takes
a deep breath as Sandy walks off. As soon as she leaves,
he lets it all out) With no water.
Sandy: Well all right. I made Texas tea and cookies.
Well, come on in! (karate chops air) Hi-ya! (Spongebob
walks a couple steps then stops) That’s not in...in! (Spongebob
walks a couple more steps then stops) You’re
a funny little dude. (takes Spongebob somewhere else) Come
on, I’ll give you the grand tour. (sun is shining
down on Spongebob & Sandy) This is my own private little
air bubble. This air is the driest... (Spongebob gasps) ...purist... (Spongebob
gasps) ...most airiest air in the whole sea. Oh, over
there’s my birdbath. (a red bird is spashling
in the birdbath) And that's my oak tree… (Spongebob
tries to sneak away to the birdbath) It provides me
with extra air. This dome is made of the finest polyurethane,
that’s a fancy word for plastic. (Spongebob tries
to sneak away to the birdbath again) Ain’t that
just the bee’s knee’s? Tell you what, weren’t
easy getting here neither. First, I... (As Sandy continues
to talk, Spongebob sneaks away for just enough time to
jump in the birdbath. The red bird punches Spongebob away
and yells at him. Spongebob lands beside Sandy) ...that’s
my treadmill. That’s how I stay in tip-top shape.
Oh, come on. Let’s have that tea now. (karate
chops air a few times then walks off as Spongebob gasps
and Patrick knocks on the treedome getting Spongebob's
Patrick: Pinky! Pinky! (Spongebob blinks and
holds up his pinky mid-way up. Now, he's sitting on a bench
still holding his flowers) I brought you some flowers.
Sandy: For me? How sweet! (Sandy grabs the flowers
but Spongebob won't let go. Eventually, she gets them off
but with Spongebob's fingers, nonetheless) You ok?
Spongebob: Yes, I’m ok.
Sandy: You know, you’re the first sea critter
to ever visit.
Spongebob: I can’t imagine why.
Sandy: Can I get you anything.
Spongebob: Water would be nice.
Sandy: I’m going to put these in a vase.
Spongebob: Take your time. (tries to open the
front door) I gotta get out of here! Ahh!
Sandy: (in Spongebob's mind) I like you,
Spongebob. We could be tighter than bark on a tree! (tries
again to open front door)
Patrick: (in Spongebob's mind) When in doubt,
pinky out. (Spongebob lifts his pinky)
Spongebob: I don’t need water! Water’s
for quitters! (walks back to the table) I don’t
need it! I don’t need it! I don’t need it!
I don’t need it, I don’t need it! (sits
down on the bench)
Sandy: Why, these flowers are just beautiful! (puts
a vase of flowers and water on the bench) They’ll
live much, much longer in a glass of ice, cold water. So
tell me about yourself. It must be fascinating being a
sea critter. (Spongebob watches a single drop of water
roll down the side of the vase) Spongebob? (timer
goes off) Oh, there’s the cookies. Be right back. (she
walks away as Spongebob is still staring at the vase)
Spongebob: (in his mind) I don’t need
it, I don’t need it, I definitely don’t need
it. (close-up on Spongebob's face) I don’t
need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it.
I don’t need it. I need it!! (jumps off the top
of the treedome and onto the bench and grabs the vase)
Patrick: No, Spongebob! No, no, no, stop! (holds
up his pinky) Pinky! Pinky! (Spongebob holds up
his pinky and starts drinking the vase water)
Spongebob: I’m a quitter! (Spongebob runs
towards the door but Patrick runs inside and closes the
door to save Spongebob)
Patrick: You can’t leave now! You’ll
Spongebob: Air is not good, Patrick! Air is not
Patrick: (grabs Spongebob and walks back to the
bench) You’re just being shy. Don’t worry,
buddy. You’re doing fine. (quickly gets tired
of walking) I won’t let you blow this. (coughs
a lot) What kind of place is this?! (tries to open
the front door with Spongebob) There’s no water
Spongebob: I tried to tell you!
Patrick: We’ve got to get out of here!
Spongebob: You’re doing it wrong!
Patrick: Wait, no! We’ve got to get out! (the
two pass out as we are shown the sun shining down as Sandy
walks up to both of them)
Sandy: Come and get it! You’re all gonna like
this... (looks down and screams from seeing Spongebob & Patrick
as their real selves. Later, she's filling up helmets for
Spongebob and Patrick with water) There, that ought
to do it! If y’all needed water, you should of asked. (Spongebob & Patrick
smile at each other) I propose a toast...to new friends! (Sandy
drinks her tea but Spongebob & Patrick can't because their
helmets are in the way) Hold on a second. (puts
tea bags inside their helmets) I hope you all like
your tea strong. (Spongebob and Patrick hold their pinkies
up as they drink their tea)